New to London..and finding my feet!!

Moving to London about 5 years back, I was completely oblivious of things I needed to be prepared for or even be aware of. I did have extended family here and few people I knew, but the knowledge of nuggets did not flow into me, and I have learnt most of the survival skills the hard way. Yes culture is one part of it, but also are the other wellbeing aspects , which if I knew earlier would have saved so much agony. So here's some experience for my other Desi women to land you in a good stead.

1. Make Merry while the Sun-shines

I landed in the month of June, which in London means 10 hours sunshine. A friend living here longer suggested I go out and enjoy a picnic! To those coming from India, we have taken the Sun, and its sunshine so much for granted that I brushed aside this suggestion conveniently. It's only when the days started getting shorter, colder, more wet and Darker, that it dawned on me that one needed to be outdoors as much as possible, not just to celebrate the Solar bounty but allow your skin to synthesize Vitamin D '.

Most of the recently moved Asian Brits suffer from this deficiency in few months of residing here and complain of lack of energy, tiredness, hair loss, and joint pain. In addition, you will probably realise that the water from the 'Thames' is very hard. Your skin feels it, and so do your hair. Yes, lack of vitamin D and hard water combined, I was also horrified at thinning and falling hair. So, please get your Vit D tested, and have supplements right from the time the winters set in.

2. Get health supplements

The London working life is much more active than the cab-office chair-bedroom read 'sedentary', lifestyle that's become the norm in India. Most of us from our generation have also our house chores being outsourced to maids/servants. Well, whether you are working or a homemaker, your overall chores in this country will toll up-from kitchen, to laundry, to cleaning to extensive unavoidable walking. While I enjoyed the walking aspect of the life here, I loathed cooking all three times. Hence the shortcuts of frozen meals, takeaways and eating out. Not so hard to guess then that my overall nutrition took a hit. In about three years time, I felt weaker than I had ever felt-losing weight, losing the healthy fat and looking very lean, and feeling very frail. So, the recommendation is to get a blood test and a doctor's check up done before you land . Good stock of natural, organic and plant based supplements, especially B12 or B complex if you are a vegetarian will also prove useful.

3. Prepare for Winters

Prepare, really?? Yes and that means mentally as well as physically. The wet, dark and cold winters are sooo lonely, that it can test good spirit in the best of us. The Months of October-April are characterized by rain, near zero temperatures, fog and snow. Mostly everyone is holed up in their dens in the evening, most supermarkets and shops shut down earlier than usual (check winter times), and the time difference with India becomes (-5.5) hours. Which means, India is already in their mid day by the time you wake up or well asleep by the time you finish work.  The anti dote to this is to stock up on good movies, books,  frozen parathas, and some milk, tea, and maggi (or whatever you may crave at 8 PM and can't get out to buy it!!

I will not get into the clothes aspect here, because you will realise pretty much soon that you can't do without a good overcoat, an umbrella, a bomber jacket, boots, sneakers, gloves ,cap  (read hat in British lingo), and a muffler/stole.

4. Mind your language..(;))

"We have just shifted from India, and are looking for a house' ...Right, the Brits usually will get it, but they will be amused why you 'shifted' instead of 'moved' or " You can find me 'sitting' on seat at the front.' instead of 'I am sat ...', the latter being the correct usage of verb 'To Sit'. For the language conscious like me, I was embarrassed when I had to repeat, para-phrase or explain something because of the different context an in which the English people used a word. In the same vein, it did take some time for my ears to train themselves to understand the English accent.

The moral is, be unabashed. DO whatever you can to learn the words faster, and comprehend the accent, but don't feel shy or out of place. If it helps, London is a huge convergence of people from all parts of the world, and you can hear English as if it sounded Spanish..Italian ....Chinese...or Tamil. Fun Fact: Like India, depending on which region you came from in the UK, your accent will vary. The Scots, and Northern UK'ites is the next level of your ocular training ..lol

5. Don't do currency conversions for your money's worth

If there is one tip that I can share with most amount of emphasis, it is this: 1 pound is just 1 pound, and not 90 rupees. 1 kg of tomato therefore costs 2 pounds and NOT 180 rupees. (For ease I just used the current conversion rate). As it is , moving here in middle age, to a new culture, new environment, new climate and lifestyle minus the Bollywood, the convenience of next door shops, the ease of meeting people spontaneously, and a no-maids everyday is a BIG BIG adjustment for your mind and body. BY doing a conversion of the necessary food items, household consumables and public transportation costs, and finding them too costly to buy, you are just torturing yourself like I did for years. If you like Maggi, and you find it at an Asian grocery shop for 40 pence -please buy it, a bunch of coriander costing 90 pence or more, please buy it. These are the small joys of your existence, bearing some semblance with the life you have had for the past 25 or more years...don't let the 'we have to save' or'this country is too expensive' bug stop you. 

The financial planning is a different game, and I hope to do a writ3e up on that too someday. but for now, that 'adrakh (ginger), lahsun (garlic) and hari  mirchi (green chilli)' are waiting for you... claim them..

6. The world moves here on diaries...

As a newly married couple, our extended family wanted to invite us. Sure they did, and sure we went to have that lunch-but it was after 2 months of the initial invite call!  I was a part of an NGO-and wanted to meet some members as I was missing the human connection and called the members. They gave me the next available date on their diary, which was 2 weeks from the present time. 2 weekssss!!! to wait for a decent face to face interaction!! to connect and pray together!!! And what if I didn't feel like doing any of the above in 2 weeks' time? what if I find something more amusing in that time, and what if the weather does not make me feel like going out!! Well, then too bad, I will have to entertain myself here and now with some other means!

Thanks to the busy life here, and complicated and multiple schedules to manage, people here have tasks planned out much in advance. They are organized and prepared for when the electrician will come, when their kids will need to be dropped and picked up from the extra classes, when they will go to meet their parents, r when they will go for beauty appointments, picnics, trips....literally everything!!. That means, you are always competing for time and it's best to book and get used to booking time with people as soon as the thought of catching up occurs to you. The same is true of professional meetings and catch ups.

7. Find Indian forums and groups

WhatsApp and Facebook do come to the rescue. Most localities and areas have local groups and associations of Indians or Asians to share share tips,  knowledge, experiences, recipes, names of good Indian restaurants and lots more. They organise events and celebrate festivals together. Look out for groups like 'Indian Women in London', or Indians in (area name) on Facebook or ask your colleagues if they know of some. Be pro-active, reach out to people, understand how they have assimilated here and invite them to share their experiences....It's a huge support to have these groups and find like minded people to reduce your turbulence in settling here and making the country your 'home' away from home.

Keen to know of your apprehensions and fear if you are new here or views on how your settling in experiences were.

 

#AsianBrit #NewtoLondon #missingIndia #AsianinLondan

Usually, the journey from DLF Cybercity to Hauz Khas takes a total of 40 mins..but that is on METRO, and at peak traffic hours! Each minute is like 65 seconds, so it seems like more than an hour being spent on your journey half way through..

Today the stop watch displayed 90 mins,though it seemed like just half an hour!!In this while, the mind however took a journey back and in future

As ABC and I started in his car for Hauz Khas,( God bless him for helping me when i was unwell), i wondered, if we will have enough to speak about..will it be a silent boring journey that i cover??Only now when i sit and write this entry, i realise how we don;t know what next few minutes can turn out to be..very similar, and yet extremely different to the kind of experience it may have to offer...

This commuting i shall title as "Music,Memory and Masti" for it was replete with allllll of these elements. Starting from a serious conversation, i tried hard to focus on ABC's i-pad and look for a good song and since his play list was on M, the first song that got accidently played was " Mere Khwabon main jo Aaye"...both iof us , couldn;t stop taking our minds to Kajol, dancing in the rain, in her skimpy white dress, but her eyes full of hope,excitement and the passion that future held..That's it..the tone was set for the car ride..

From Aaj din chadiya of Love aaj Kal, to Dholna of Dil to Pagal hai, we kept punctuating these songs with small peeks into  our lives, and the past times with which each of these songs was associated..No wonder each song had its own story in the years of adolescence till now..from movie songs to discussion of dialogoues, scenes..kajol again in KKHH , to Madhuri in DTPH, to Saif saying "Meera tum nahi samjhogi yaar" in love aajakal..

There were times we both couldn;t control our laughter and i had to tell him to concentrate on driving..While a bad heartbreak was his reason, Aishwarya's name as Megha was mine to hate the movie Mohahabattein..What a devastating impact love has on people we  both thought...remembering our heartbreak songs..I f that wasn't enough, I reminded him of te song" Chup Chup Ke" from bunty Bubbly while all he could remember was Raaaaani in it...

And so we moved on to Singdi and Hookah Baar of 786...before i realised, we had reached Haus Khas..i got down.,.,took an auto...more rejuvenated that i was in the morning...

Guess music has that power and will continue to have for eternity...the notes will always flow through the threads of time..pick up yours..and recall the fond memories...Let your heart sing out its joy,its pain,its happiness..fear, but ultimately, remember that all is transient and that this shall pass too..so hold on to this moment and live it to the full..kyunki kya pata.."kal ho na ho";)

So here's a parting song from us...http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oW3Ed0lWfAU

xoxo

Phoenix

Lonnng Lonng time since I can remember..
I had left someting very dear to me on a road...A road less travelled..
I had left behind my pen and expressions,
hidden in the maze of my mind..
today I revisit the old paths..
and fondly wipe the dust off...

My own musings have been calling me for long..
Someone had made me promise to never let this love go..
So here,a fresh page and a new chapter opens..
of all the tales I have collected..
let's see which one finds expression..

Vibrantmegs..I am back...hope to be there...

From Dilli to Punjab and back

Just Returned from an interesting trip to Punjab!My state of birth and the land where I feel i belong,even though have been brought up in my beloved city Delhi....
The northern belt of the country was covered with a cold wave and "carry a lot of woollens:"is what i was told by people there...so managed to dig out the warmest clothes I had and went ahead for the trip,mentally telling myself,that its just in the mind...will not get bogged down by the cold,the fog or the general gloominess that pervades the winters!!

But as they say,the environment is a reflection of you..just the day we were to reach,the sun had obliged and come out of its hibernation,thawing the state and its soil,bringing in the much needed warmth.So happy and surprised at the same time,by the pleasant weather,wondered if my woollens will be used to the extent (after all i had carried their weight on my shoulders" :0)...

The trip was adventurous in certain aspects(like travelling all alone on uncomirfmed ticket in the late evening train), but one thing that touched my heart was the journey back from amritsar to jalandhar.....

The two cities are 1.5 hours away from each other...and there are many trains that ply between them, so that the frequency is almost an hour or 2 between..but the catch is that there is a heavy rush in the trains.There are a lot of people who shuttle daily for various reasons,but the major one is moolah...lots of them have businesses in one city and need to travel to the other. And these people grade right from labourers of bihar,UP,Punjab to the localites who have become wealthy travelling many years from one city to the other...

....So being a short distance travel people don't generally buy tickets in advance and rather travel on current booking.For the uninitiated like i was,current booking means an uncomfirmed ticket which gets confirmed on your physical strength and speed to jostle among the crowd and obtain a seat even if you have to throw your slipper from window and reserve it!
So there we were,on the railway station,having an uncomfirmed ticket and quite some luggage ,smugly waiting for the train and i longing for a seat to rest and watch the sarso fields we so loved in DDLJ..and there came our train....a very long train chugging on the platform....and suddenly..suddenly alll the trace of humanity that you could find rushed towards the train's general compartment...oh oh!we thought,(and my dream of catching a seat to ponder seeming to escape me like the moving train bogies)...how will we make it??ouch the rush,save!!!
and then!a hero swung into action..the coolie we had asked to carry our luggage transformed to a spiderman and in the moving train itself,he pulled open a window and creeped inside from the 3-5 inch gap there was..the slender figure just reached inside to reserve a seat for us!

And woa,not only did he reserve a seat he came repetitively to the door we were standing and trying to get in from to take a piece of our luggage one by one and assert the ownership on the seats as each bag and suitcase was taken from us to place on the seat...and then he helped mamma n me to board the train...

I was truly touched...it was not just for money that he did it..he could have easily taken it from us and left ....but the pain and heroic deed he did was impressive.I felt something thta seems now difficult to explain,but was very humbling and touching at the same time...

so off we went on our journey,and i quite moved by the recent experience i had...the one hour passed by qiuckly... a small nap and hardly any attention payed to the ddlj fields:)..

LITERARY BLOCK!

Often it has happened to the biggest geniuses in the world!it is something very common,yet a peculiar phenomenon!...this state called "literary block"...

Often there are activities and things that most interest you.Things that help you connect best to yourself! Forus Indians, someone very nicely put it"half the people in the country love cricket and the rest half like to READ!! "..OK, so I fall in the second category,for i am loathe to cricket!!

To go on about why is it(cricket) such a boring thing would take a lot of effort,and besides one does not want to talk about the subject one loathes..(any cricket fan reading this would be up against me with all arms and ammunitions,but people are not bound to love the same things,right?)...

So coming back to reading and writing(poems,articles,blogs)..few of those activities which instantly connect me to myself.There are times when one wants to escape from the harsh/boring/hollow world around,and writing or reading a book is one cocoon I always retreat to whenever the heart inside wants to feel liberated!

But off late,my literary faculties seem to have dimmed somewhere.Not only do I feel reading books as a time consuming activity,but also those books on the shelf,which I soooo wanted and was thrilled to receive stare at me accusingly,of having abondoned them!!

I wonder why such a block has sprung up.Even making an entry on the blog seems to be a difficult thing(last blog-2 months back)..Earlier when ideas to write emerged from every event and happening around,evrything seems to be drone now!

well I am no booker winner...nor do i compare to the best literattis in the country...but surely I have had my share of the block phenomena and hope that when the hobbies re-emerge ,a masterpiece takes form,like an award winning piece of work after a sabbatical!!


wISH ME!

Rain Rain Come again!!!

Yssss!!Rain!..How I love it when it rains..Has the love got to do something with my name?maybe..i wont deny..for i love it since i can remember...for i have dreamt of sitting in the room with glass ceilings on a rainy day,snuggled with a book sipping hot tea in hand since forever and still do....

Oh yes..i dont like getting wet in rain.Very convenient some would say to just be a spectator rather driving in a jammed (rainy )road,longing to get home after a long day or walking without umbrella..Well then thats the way i love it!

Yesterday it rained realllly really hard..so hard and was accompanied with its best friend...the wind!!WHat a spectacle it was...what a delight it was..my heart was filled with awe..i was jumping in the house,and my parents pleasantly surprised if my cooing away was because of some other reason??they wondered if i had seen rain for the first time?Well the answer is yes and no..no because its obvious ..yes because each time this natural phenomena called rain happens it brings with it a freshness..a purifying feeling..washing away everything that it needs to..trees,leaves,roads,cars,and most important,our worries, pains deep in the heart...it seems that the falling rain and the accompanying breeze are just lifting you away..they take you away from the monotony of life,rustling your hair,swishing against your face....if you get to sit by an open window or your balcony....

Haven't so many people written poems on rain?Have n't so many movies shot their most romantic scenes in rain?haven't the kids been shown to enjoy the maximum when being soaked in rain?Its "PURE MAGIC"...

And with all the pakoras and samosas that we indias like to indulge in on a rainy day,i like it for another reason..!All the fm stations start playing songs on rain..AND That inevitably means my name is sung in those numbers!!!"from megha e megha re..to kya teri marzi hai megha(DTPH),and kaale megha kaale megha....

I leave it at that ....keep bhigoing! and post in your rain experiences!


God bless...


ps:..did i forget to mention the beautiful sound that touches your soul???

down the memory lane..

It was long since I had written on my blog..rather I was wondering what I could write on..and here I chanced upon this article I had written for school's alumni magazine..I am sure its gonna be nice for my class 12 buddies to read and remember those days

"

MEMORY FRAMES……

When first told to write an article for this alumni letter,I started thinking of a particular memory I would like to pen down. My thoughts were “What particular event should I write about”? ”Is there something about the school that has left an indelible mark on me”?

Going just a little deeper ,I realized NO-There is not one thing I can pin point, because the person that I am is because of the school. My thinking, attitude, beliefs is because of what I grew up to be in MIS with the strong influence of the Ashram -the backbone of school

SO here, my dilemma ended with this realization .But yes, I would not forget to mention how in my last 2 years at school ,I totally and thoroughly enjoyed myself. Somehow, I could break away from this studious girl that I was(Much to Annapoorni mam’s delight) into someone who despite pressures from so many sides, could enjoy herself sometimes No doubt I became a struggler, giving nightmares to our physics sir-But the fact remains-we had as much fun to remember it in years to come.

Wearing lab coat with o powered spects to give that nerdy look, sneakily chattering in Rajalakshmi mam’s class, breaking the scientific monotony with Deepti Gulati Mam’s English classes and not to forget giggling, laughing with my friend Mirra-much to the pain of our class’s IIT inclined intelligentsia-Pranay, Pratik, Somani, Himanshu, Manu, Anish,…Their problem-They didn’t understand our jokes।Bigger Problem-,They could not stop our uncontrollable giggles.

Annual Days-Aaah those zero periods-Festive time in school.All taking Tara didi’s grand finale yoga sessions with mixed feelings-Groans on one side but secret happiness of having our classes cut by 5 minutes each…and being on the field.. Yipppee

The last annual day that I participated in was school’s 44th annual day celebrations. It was a ballet on India’s Spiritual Destiny and I played the role of Manthra-The clever old lady

In the Ramayana who instigated Kaykeyi to ask for the 3 promised boons from King Dashratha.(.Poor Lordrama.)What a gala time we had. Staying late for practices, sitting and gazing at the stars in idle times., pulling each others legs amidst samosas and bread pakoras,and also glancing at my friend’s crush who happened to be participating too..These form a part of the numerous things that make me feel nostalgic about school…

Where should I begin writing about my other memories..special assemblies at ashram,recitations,volley ball practices,trips to Jhansi, Pondicherry, Nainital Dalhousie…..May be another day, another page for them.

Thanks Mother, for blessings ."